Demons. Ghosts. Witches. Entities. I was never scared of these things ever since childhood. Probably because my grandmother would often tell me stories before going to bed that would make me stronger and less of a coward unlike other girls of my age. But of course, I am human and I had to be afraid of something or the other. Exams, my mischief, my tuition teacher, my father and so many such things I was afraid of. At times I would be afraid of not knowing what I am afraid of. But then every night as I went to sleep with my grandmother, she would hold my hand and sleep. That would give me courage to face my tomorrow, until one day she left us. That night I just couldn't sleep. I was scared. I was helpless and felt a huge vacuum. After a few nights of sleeping with my parents, I had to go back and sleep in my room. The bed felt so empty. There were nights I would just wake up in the middle of the night and cry.
A night before the result of my exams, I was super scared. Unlike every time, this time I didn't have my granny. I slept on the edge of the bed. I was swinging my hand below the bed. A hand gently held my hand from below the bed. I was terrified. It felt soft and warm. It somehow just made me feel better. Instead of getting scared I just loved it. I felt as if it was my granny's hand. I wanted to look down. But I was afraid that I might lose her again. So I just held it. I held it every night. It just gave me hope and courage to face my tomorrow. I never looked down. It sounds scary I know but sometimes the scariest things make you strong.
I got married. I was scared again. Scared of the responsibilities, expectations and like always scared about tomorrow. I would try to find her hand below the bed I slept with my husband. But I would never get it. One night I was deeply missing my family and had to prepare lunch for in laws for the first time the next day all the thoughts just made me feel afraid and depressed. I went to the end of the bed and aimlessly searched for the hand. Suddenly I was pulled back and a hand just held me really tight. It was my husband. I felt comfort and warmth. He held my hand and I slept peacefully. I had found it.
A night before the result of my exams, I was super scared. Unlike every time, this time I didn't have my granny. I slept on the edge of the bed. I was swinging my hand below the bed. A hand gently held my hand from below the bed. I was terrified. It felt soft and warm. It somehow just made me feel better. Instead of getting scared I just loved it. I felt as if it was my granny's hand. I wanted to look down. But I was afraid that I might lose her again. So I just held it. I held it every night. It just gave me hope and courage to face my tomorrow. I never looked down. It sounds scary I know but sometimes the scariest things make you strong.
I got married. I was scared again. Scared of the responsibilities, expectations and like always scared about tomorrow. I would try to find her hand below the bed I slept with my husband. But I would never get it. One night I was deeply missing my family and had to prepare lunch for in laws for the first time the next day all the thoughts just made me feel afraid and depressed. I went to the end of the bed and aimlessly searched for the hand. Suddenly I was pulled back and a hand just held me really tight. It was my husband. I felt comfort and warmth. He held my hand and I slept peacefully. I had found it.
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